Professors of different subjects define kiss the same word in different ways:

Prof. of Computer Science:
A kiss is a few bits of love compiled into a byte.


Prof. of Algebra:
A kiss is two divided by nothing.


Prof. of Geometry:
A kiss is the shortest distance between two straight lines.


Prof. of Physics:
A kiss is the contraction of mouth due to the expansion of the heart.


Prof. of Chemistry:
A kiss is the reaction of the interaction between two hearts.


Prof. of Zoology:
A kiss is the interchange of uni*---**---**---*ual salivary bacteria.


Prof. of Physiology:
A kiss is the juxtaposition of two orbicular ors muscles in the state of contraction.


Prof. of Dentistry:
A kiss is infectious and antiseptic.


Prof. of Accountancy:
A kiss is a credit because it is profitable when returned.


Prof. of Economics:
A kiss is that thing for which the demand is higher than the supply.


Prof. of Statistics:
A kiss is an event whose probability depends on the vital statistics of 36-24-36.


Prof. of Philosophy:
A kiss is the persecution for the child, ecstasy for the youth and homage for the old.


Prof. of English:
A kiss is a noun that is used as a conjunction; it is more common than proper; it is spoken in the plural and it is applicable to all.

Prof. of Engineering:
Uh, What? I'm not familiar with that term.

Dream that Indicates Wealth

1. If you see any God/Goddess in your dream, it truly indicates that you will achieve success along with wealth in coming days.
2. Watching a woman or girl dancing in your dreams is also an indication of receiving wealth.
3. Viewing kingfisher or crane in your dream also indicates respect and wealth coming to you within few days.
4. Viewing 'Kadam' tree in a dream is also an indicator of receiving wealth, good health and respect.
5. If you see 'Amla' and the flower lotus in your dream, it denotes that you are about to receive money in few days.
6. Seeing yourself wearing earrings in your dream is also an indication of receiving money.
7. Dreaming about a farmer working in his field indicates that you will receive wealth from any unknown source.
8. Dreaming about a lit 'Deepak' connotes some sort of blessings that you might receive in few days.
9. Viewing gold in your dream is also considered as an indicator of receiving wealth.
10. Seeing yourself wearing a ring in your dream also implies wealth.
11. Seeing a palace in your dream also indicates receiving a lot of wealth.
12. Taking milk out of a cow in your dream is also considered as an indicator of wealth.
13. Watching someone also taking milk out of the cow implies receiving sudden wealth.
14. Watching a white horse in your dream indicates happy future and wealth.
15. Viewing elephant in your dream denotes that you might receive wealth from any source.
16. Dreaming about a cow in your dream is also considered as a very auspicious sign. The viewer receives wealth, glory, grandeur and magnificence.
17. Dreaming about cow's milk and 'ghee' also denotes receiving of wealth.
18. The tree laden with fruits indicates wealth and richness.
19. Watching mice in your dream indicated wealth coming in your home.
20. Viewing black Scorpio in a dream signifies wealth.
21. Dreaming of a raised head of the snake connotes receiving wealth.
22. Watching a snake near his burrow indicates sudden receiving wealth.
23. If you see a dead bird in your dream, do not worry. It is a good sign and indicates sudden gain of wealth.
24. Viewing parrot in your dream is a strong indication if receiving money.
25. Watching mongoose in your dream signifies receiving diamonds and jewelries.
26. If you see the hive of bees in your dream then, it is an indication of gaining wealth.
27. If you see white ants in your dream, then also it indicates gain of wealth.
28. Dreaming about 'Aam ka Bagicha' implies all of a sudden gain of wealth and richness.
29. If you see yourself climbing a tree, then it indicates earning of money and wealth.
30. Watching yourself climbing a mountain in a dream is also an indicator of receiving money.

Human Brain Analysis--Man vs. Woman

Human Brain Analysis--Man vs. Woman



1. MULTI-TASKING

Womens brains designed to concentrate multiple task at a time. Women can Watch a TV and Talk over phone and cook. Mens brains designed to concentrate only one work at a time. Men can not watch TV and talk over the phone at the same time. they stop the TV while Talking. They can either watch TV or talk over the phone or cook.

2. LANGUAGE

Women can easily learn many languages. But can not find solutions to problems. Men can not easily learn languages, they can easily solve problems. That's why in average a 3 years old girl has three times higher vocabulary than a 3 years old boy.

3. ANALYTICAL SKILLS

Mens brains has a lot of space for handling the analytical process. They can analyze and find the solution for a process and design a map of a building easily. But If a complex map is viewed by women, they can not understand it. Women can not understand the details of a map easily, For them it is just a dump of lines on a paper.

4. CAR DRIVING.

While driving a car, mans analytical spaces are used in his brain. He can drive a car fastly. If he sees an object at long distance, immediately his brain classifies the object (bus or van or car) direction and speed of the object and he drives accordingly. Where woman take a long time to recognize the object direction/ speed. Mans single process mind stops the audio in the car (if any), then concentrates only on driving.

5. LYING

When men lie to women face to face, they get caught easily. Womans super natural brain observes facial expression 70%, body language 20% and words coming from the mouth 10%. Mens brain does not have this. Women easily lie to men face to face. So guys, do not lie face to face.

6. PROBLEMS SOLVING


If a man have a lot of problems, his brain clearly classifies the problems and puts them in individual rooms in the brain and then finds the solution one by one. You can see many guys looking at the sky for a long time. If a woman has a lot of problems, her brain can not classify the problems. she wants some one to hear that. After telling everything to a person she goes happily to bed. She does not worry about the problems being solved or not.

7. WHAT THEY WANT

Men want status, success, solutions, big process, etc... But Women want relationship, friends, family, etc...

8. UNHAPPINESS

If women are unhappy with their relations, they can not concentrate on their work. If men are unhappy with their work, they can not concentrate on the relations.

9. SPEECH

Women use indirect language in speech. But Men use direct language.

10. HANDLING EMOTION

Women talk a lot without thinking. Men act a lot without thinking

Natural Cure

CURE FOR ACIDITY


Acidity, it is said, is worse than Cancer. It is one of the most common dis-ease people encounter in their daily life. The home remedy for Acidity is Raw Grains of Rice.

The Process:

1. Take 8 - 10 grains of raw uncooked rice

2. Swallow it with water before having your breakfast or eating anything in the morning

3. Do this for 21 days to see effective results and continuously for 3 months to eliminate acidity from the body

The Cure:

Reduces acid levels in the body and makes you feel better by the day.


CURE FOR CHOLESTEROL:


Cholesterol problem accompanies with Hypertension and Heart Problems. This is also one of the common problems in people who have High Blood Pressure and Diabetes. The home remedy for Cholesterol problem is RAW SUPARI.

The Process:

1. Take Raw Supari (Betel Nut that is not flavoured) and slice them or make pieces of the same

2. Chew it for about 20 - 40 minutes after every meal

3. Spit it out

The Cure:

When you chew the supari, the saliva takes in the juice that is generated and this acts like a Blood Thinner. Once your blood becomes free flowing, it brings down the pressure in the blood flow, thereby reducing Blood Pressure too.


CURE FOR BLOOD PRESSURE:


One of the simple home remedy cure for Blood Pressure is Methi Seeds or Fenugreek Seeds.

The Process:

1. Take a pinch of Raw Fenugreek Seeds, about 8 - 10 seeds

2. Swallow it with water before taking your breakfast, every morning

The Cure:

The seeds of Fenugreek are considered good to reduce the blood pressure.



CURE FOR DIABETES:

There are 2 home remedies for Diabetes. One is Ladies Finger and the other is Black Tea.

BLACK TEA:Due to high medication, the organ that is worst affected is the Kidney. It has been observed that Black Tea (tea without milk, sugar or lemon) is good for the Kidney. Hence a cup of black tea every morning is highly advisable.


The Process:
1. Boil water along with the tea leaves (any tea leaves will do).

2. Drink the concoction without addingmilk, sugar or lemon.

The Cure:
Black Tea will help in enhancing the function of the kidney, thereby not affecting it more.



LADIES FINGER or OKRA:
Ladies finger is considered to be a good home medicine for diabetes.


The Process:
1. Slit the ladies finger into 2 halves vertically and soak it in water overnight.

2. The next morning, remove the ladies fingers and drink the water, before eating your breakfast.

The Cure:
After the ladies fingers are soaked overnight in the water, you can observe that the water becomes sticky in the morning. This sticky water is considered to be good for people who suffer from Diabetes.



OIL PULLING:


Dr. Med. Karch, a Russian, introduced a simple process for the Human body by using oil. This was further popularized by Lt. Col T. Koteswara Rao (Retd.). Initially it causes doubts, but after trying it out the results are astonishing.

The Process:
1. Take one spoon of refined oil in the mouth on an empty stomach early in the morning, before eating or drinking anything.

2. Without much effort or speed, slowly suck and pull the oil through the teeth. Gargle the oil within closed mouth for 15 - 20 minutes.

3. During this process, the oil becomes liquid and white like milk. Spit the liquid out and wash your mouth thoroughly, preferably with warm water.

4. DO NOT SWALLOW the oil as it contains toxins and harmful bacteria drawn from the body through the saliva. Continue this process everyday for better results.

The Cure:
The process of Oil Pulling can give relief and cure Headaches, Asthma, Bad Breath, Nose Block, Tooth Pain, Acidity, Ulcers, Cracked Feet, Joint Pains, Stomach Problems, Problems related to Lungs, Liver & Nerves.

Who can practice this:
Oil Pulling can be practiced by all from the age of 5 years onwards for any type of health problems. People who are in a habit of taking a lot of medicines should try this, as it will release a lot of toxins from the body.

Which Oil to be Used:
Any cooking oil can be used, but the most preferred is the Sesame Oil.

don't mesh with Engineer

interviewer :Let me check your word Power... ENGINEER: ok Sir ..... Interviewer : Tell me the opposite of .....good. ENGINEER: hmmmm..... Bad Interviewer : Come ENGINEER: Go. Interviewer : Ugly. ENGINEER: Pichlli. Interviewer : PICHLLIIIII? ENGINEER: UGLYYYYYYYYY.. Interviewer : Shut Up. ENGINEER: Keep Talking. Interviewer ok now stop these all.. ENGINEER: now carry on this all Interviewer :abe...chup ho ja..chup ho ja..chup ho jaaaa ENGINEER:abe bolta rah..bolta rah..bolta rahhh Interviewer :Areeee yaaar ENGINEER: areeee dushmannnnnn Interviewer : Get Out. ENGINEER: Come In. Interviewer : Oh my God. ENGINEER : Oh my Devil. Interviewer : U r Rejected. ENGINEER: I m selected...Than k u thank u sir. Moral-Dont ever try to mess with engineer..

Wives

1. Quote on a man’s T-shirt:

All women are devils...

But my wife is QUEEN of them!

2.Man was sent on earth to suffer...

Women was sent to make sure it happens!

3. A man asked for poison.

Chemist refused, since it required prescription.

He showed his Marriage Certificate.

4. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right,

And other is husband!

5. Husband Wife always compromise.

Husband always admits that he is wrong, and wife agrees with him.

6. Husband wife had a long argument.

Wife concluded: See dear; do you want to WIN or be HAPPY?

7. A man speaks 25000 words daily,

A woman speaks 30000 words.

Problem starts when husband comes from office after finishing his 25000,

Wife starts her quota of 30000 words!

8. Boy: My dad is billionaire 93-years old.

He will die soon.

Will you marry me?

Girl: NO.

A week later she became his step-mother.

Moral: Don’t give ideas to girls.

9. Two things in life are difficult to achieve:

(1) to plant your idea in someone’s head,

(2) to plant somebody’s money in your pocket.

10. * He who succeeds in the 1st, we call him TEACHER;

* He who succeeds in the 2nd, we call him GOVERNMENT;

* The one who succeeds in both, we call WIFE;

* The one who fails in both, we call HUSBAND!

11. Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE?

It Means-Worries Invited For Ever...

Wife: No; it means- With Idiot For Ever !!!

12. No one teaches a volcano how to erupt...

No one teaches a tsunami how to arise…

No one teaches a hurricane how to sway around...

No one teaches a man how to choose a wife…

Natural Disasters just happen…!!!

13. Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia?

The Mafia wants either or money or life...

The wives want both!

14. Searching these keywords on Google 'How to tackle wife?'

Google search result, 'Good day sir, Even we are searching'.

15. Compromising does not mean you are wrong and your wife is right.

It only means that the safety of your head is much more important than your ego!

16. Imagine living with 3 wives in one compound and never leaving the house for 5 years.

Osama Bin Laden must have called the US Navy Seals himself!

17. Whisky is a brilliant invention…

One double and you start feeling single again.

18. A friend recently explained why he refuses to get to married.

He says the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs.

19. American: In India, do you guys call your wives HONEY in your native language?

Indian: Oh no; we call them BEE-BEE… they sting twice as hard as HONEY BEE…