Definations

Definition of cigarette
CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper
with fire at one end and a fool at the other!


definition of marriage
MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement wherein
a man loses his bachelor degree
and a woman gains her masters.

definition of lecture
LECTURE:
An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer
to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either.

Definition of conference
CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man
multiplied by the number present

Definition of compromise
COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that
everybody believes he got the biggest piece

Definition of TEARS
TEARS:
The hydraulic force by which
masculine will power is
defeated by feminine water-power!

definition of dictionary
DICTIONARY:
A place where divorce comes before marriage

definition of conference room
CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks,
nobody listens
and everybody disagrees later on

definition of ecstasy
ECSTASY:
A feeling when you feel
you are going to feel
a feeling you have never felt before

definition of classic
CLASSIC:
A book which people praise,
but never read

definition of smile
SMILE:
A curve that can set
a lot of things straight!

definition of office
OFFICE:
A place
where you can relax
after your strenuous
home life

definition of yawn
YAWN:
The only time
when some married men
ever get to open their mouth

definition of etc
ETC:
A sign to make others believe
that you know more than
you actually do

definition of committee
COMMITTEE:
Individuals who can do
nothing individually and sit to decide
that nothing can be done together

definition of experience
EXPERIENCE:
The name men give to their Mistakes

definition of atom bomb
ATOMBOMB:
An invention to bring an end
to all inventions


definition of philosopher
PHILOSOPHER:
A fool who torments himself
during life, to be spoken of
when dead


definition of diplomat
DIPLOMAT:
A person who tells you
to go to hell in such a way
that you actually look forward
to the trip

definition of opportunist
OPPORTUNIST:
A person who starts taking bath
if he accidentally falls into a river

definition of optimist
OPTIMIST:
A person who while falling
from EIFFELTOWER
says in midway
"SEEI AM NOT INJURED YET!"

definition of pessimist
PESSIMIST:
A person who says that
O is the last letter in ZERO,
Instead of the first letter
in OPPORTUNITY

definition of miser
MISER:
A person who lives poor
so that he can die RICH!

definition of father
FATHER:
A banker provided by nature

definition of criminal
CRIMINAL:
A guy no different from the other,
unless he gets caught

definition of boss
BOSS:
Someone who is early
when you are late
and late when you are early

definition of politician
POLITICIAN:
One who shakes your hand
before elections and your Confidence
Later

definition of doctor
DOCTOR:
A person who kills
your ills by pills,
and kills you
by his bills!    

Benefits of Turmeric

1. Respiratory illness:
Turmeric milk is an anti-microbial which attacks bacterial infections and viral infections. It is useful to treat illnesses related to respiratory system, since the spice heats up your body and provides quick relief from lung congestion and sinuses. This is also an effective remedy to cure asthma and bronchitis.

2. Cancer:
This milk prevents and stops the growth of breast, skin, lung, prostate, and colon cancers, since it has anti-inflammatory properties. This prevents cancer cells from damaging DNA and reduces the side effects of chemotherapy.

3. Anti Inflammatory:
Turmeric milk is anti-inflammatory, that can prevent and protect arthritis and stomach ulcers. This is also known as ‘natural aspirin’ in Ayurvedic medicine that can cure headaches, swelling and pain.

4. Cold and Cough:
Turmeric Milk is considered as a best remedy for cold and cough due to its antiviral and antibacterial properties. It gives instant relief to sore throat, cough and cold.

5. Arthritis:
Turmeric Milk is used to cure arthritis and treat swelling due to rheumatoid arthritis. It also helps to make the joints and muscles flexible by reducing the pain.

6. Aches and Pains:
Turmeric golden milk gives best relief from aches and pains. This can also strengthen the spine and joints in the body.

7. Antioxidant:
Turmeric milk is excellent source of antioxidants, which fights free radicals. This can cure many ailments.

8. Blood Purifier:
Turmeric Milk is considered as an excellent blood purifier and cleanser in Ayurvedic
tradition. It can revitalize and boost blood circulation in the body. It is also a blood thinner that cleanses the lymphatic system and blood vessels from all impurities.

9. Liver Detox:
Turmeric milk is a natural liver detoxifier and blood purifier that boosts liver function. It supports the liver and cleanses the lymphatic system.

10. Bone Health:
Turmeric milk is a good source of calcium which is a must to keep the bones healthy and strong. India’s batting legend Sachin Tendulkar drinks this daily for good bone health. Turmeric milk lowers bone loss and osteoporosis.

11. Digestive Health:
It is a powerful antiseptic that promotes intestinal health and treats stomach ulcers and colitis. This helps in better digestive health and prevents ulcers, diarrhea and indigestion.

12. Menstrual Cramps:
Turmeric milk works wonder as it is antispasmodic that eases menstrual cramps and pain. Pregnant women should take golden turmeric milk for easy delivery, post partum recovery, improved lactation and faster contraction of ovaries.

13. Rash and Skin Redness:
Cleopatra took turmeric milk baths for soft, supple and glowing skin. Similarly, drink turmeric milk for glowing skin. Soak turmeric milk in a cotton ball; apply on the affected area for 15 minutes to reduce skin redness and blotchy patches. This will make the skin more radiant and glowing than before.

14. Weight Loss:
Turmeric milk helps in the breakdown of dietary fat. This can be useful to control weight.

15. Eczema:
Drink a glass of turmeric milk everyday to treat eczema.

16. Insomnia:
Warm turmeric milk produces an amino acid, tryptophan; that induces peaceful and blissful sleep.

· Turmeric is fortified with analgesic and antiseptic properties. Apply on cuts and wounds to heal and avoid infections.

· For easing stomach disorders turmeric is useful. It helps digestion and gives relief from irritable bowel syndrome.

· Turmeric is known to aid in prevention of degenerative diseases like Alzheimer's and preventing growth of blood vessels in tumours.

· Drinking milk with a little haldi daily is good for strengthening bones and help prevent Osteoporosis.

· Mix a little turmeric with besan and water. Rub this paste on your body, leave it for sometime and wash off later. This will make skin supple and make it glow.

· Because of its anti-inflammatory properties, turmeric is beneficial in treating arthritis and rheumatoid arthritis and skin ailments like psoriasis.

· It is rich is antoxidants and helps prevent formation of free radicals and other carcinogenic compounds that lead to cancer.

· To boost metabolism and reduce weight, turmeric is useful. It also acts as a blood purifier.

· To reduce cholesterol and a reduced risk of arteriosclerosis, turmeric is helpful. 

Mental Attitude

1. When Snake is alive, Snake eats Ants.
When Snake is dead, Ants eat Snake.
Time can turn at any time.
Don't neglect anyone in your life.......

2. Never make the same mistake twice,
There are so many new ones,
Try a different one each day.

3. A good way to change someone's attitude is to change your own.
Because, the same sun that melts butter, also hardens clay!
Life is as we think, so think beautifully.

4. Life is just like a sea, we are moving without an end.
Nothing stays with us,
What remains is just the memories of some people who touched us as Waves.

5. Whenever you want to know how rich you are?
Never count your currency,
Just try to Drop a Tear and count how many hands reach out to WIPE that- that is true richness.

6. Heart tells the eyes see less, because you see and I suffer lot.
Eyes replied, feel less because you feel and I cry a lot.

7. Never change your originality for the sake of others,
Because no one can play your role better than you.
So be yourself, because whatever you are, YOU are the best.

8. Baby mosquito came back after 1st time flying.
His dad asked him "How do you feel?"
He replied "It was wonderful, Everyone was clapping for me!"
Now thats a Positive Attitude.

This is hilarious!

This is hilarious! Be sure to read the warning at the bottom. I didn't change a word! I'm not messing with the Sex Fairy!

1. Sex is a beauty treatment. Scientific tests find that when women make love they produce amounts of the hormone estrogen, which makes hair shine and skin smooth.
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2. Gentle, relaxed lovemaking reduces your chances of suffering dermatitis, skin rashes and blemishes. The sweat produced cleanses the pores and makes your skin glow.
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3. Lovemaking can burn up those calories you piled on during that romantic dinner.
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4. Sex is one of the safest sports you can take up. It stretches and tones up just about every muscle in the body. It's more enjoyable than swimming 20 laps, and you don't need special sneakers!
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5. Sex is an instant cure for mild depression. It releases endorphins into the bloodstream, producing a sense of euphoria and leaving you with a feeling of well-being.
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6. The more sex you have, the more you will be offered. The sexually active body gives off greater quantities of chemicals called pheromones. These subtle sex perfumes drive the opposite sex crazy!
=============
7. Sex is the safest tranquilizer in the world. IT IS 10 TIMES MORE EFFECTIVE THAN VALIUM.
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8. Kissing each day will keep the dentist away. Kissing encourages saliva to wash food from the teeth and lowers the level of the acid that causes decay, preventing plaque build-up.
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9. Sex actually relieves headaches. A lovemaking session can release the tension that restricts blood vessels in the brain.
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10. A lot of lovemaking can unblock a stuffy nose. Sex is a natural antihistamine. It can help combat asthma and hay fever.

100 Reasons Why It's Great To Be A Woman

1.  Working / Earning not mandatory.

2.  We never have to buy our own drinks at the bar.

3.  We don't have to bother on mobile bills.

4.  We get out of speeding tickets by crying.

5.  We don't have to stand on the queue to get tickets.

6.  We can sleep our way to the top of the class.

7.  We don't have to worry about the purse when we shop with men.

8.  We can marry rich and then not have to work.
  

9.  We never have to pay when we go out on dates.

10.  Men take us on all expense paid trips

11.  We always get place to sit when using public transport.

12.  Easy to get a ride.

13.  Men hold the door open for us.

14.  Jewels looks good on us.

15.  We lie better.

16.  We're better manipulators.

17.  We always end up sleeping in the bed when we fight with our other halves - you guys get the couch.

18.  We always have food in the fridge.

19.  We don't worry about losing our hair.

20.  We always get to choose the movie.

21.  We don't have to mow the lawn.

22.  We don't have to take out the garbage.

23.  We don't have to paint the house or walls.
24. If we need to our boyfriends just a missed call is enough.

25. We can easily show our disappointments or disapprovals.

26.  We can con our way out of anything - not just  dig ourselves deeper into a hole.

27.  Men unlock our side of the car first - a real bonus when its cold.

28. Even strangers shows care if we are in trouble. Men have to manage themselves.

29.  Men are like tiles, lay 'em right the first  time you can walk all over em forever.

30. We can cry in public. Men cant.

31. We don't feel shy to cry.

32. We don have worry if we lose the fight.

33.  Sweat is sexy on us.

34.  We never run out of excuses.

35.  You guys may get to think about sex 200 times a day, but we could be having it that often.

36. We can borrow clothes or accessories from our friends.

37.  We get expensive jewelry as gifts that we NEVER have to give back.

38.  We get candy, flowers and jewelry all the time because men screw up so often.

39.  We can give "the look" that will make any man want to cower in the corner.

40.  Women are cleaner.

41. We know how to make up stories.

42.  We're better arguers.

43.  We don't always have to think with our genitals.

44. We don't have to worry if we are plump. Men still like us.

45.  We're better parents.

46.  We never have to sit home alone on a weekend night. 
47.  There's never a shortage of ready, willing, and able men.

48.  We're flexible.

49.  When women get upset, we don't destroy property or hurt people - we just take it out on the world in general because we can.

50. Easy to make friendships.

51. Much easy to get a date.

52.  Men have to be in uniform.

53. We can do makeup anywhere

54. If we do heavy purchase we don't have to carry those things. Men are there.

55.  It generally takes us less to get drunk.

56.  We have a higher tolerance to pain.

57.  We often get to cut in line (Queue).

58.  Most women actually look good in short shorts      - men DON'T.

59.  Better tips.

60.  Women who don't wear underwear are considered sexy and wild, when men do it, it's rather disgusting

61.  We have mastered civilized eating - we don't embarrass our friends or make loud bodily noises in public.

62.  Women can go a day without showering or shaving and not look or smell disgusting - thank heaven for long pants and perfume!

63.  We can connive men into doing our homework, writing our papers or carrying our books anytime we want.

64.  We don't have excessive amounts of body hair.

65.  We don't spend 45 minutes on the toilet.

66. We don't bother if our IQ level is less. Just a smile is enough.

67. We are always smart.

68.  We can throw a punch at a man and not get hit in return.

69.  We don't have to lie to boast ourselves better.

70.  Men walk on the side of the sidewalk closest to the road so that if a car hits us, he gets hurt not us. 
71.  Women sweat less.

72.  Women smell better.

73.  When women make their boyfriends mad, we don't have to waste money on flowers or cards

74.  Men are more often serial killers, thieves, rapists and cheats.

75. We don get charged if we tease men in public.

76. We can be late to the office.

77.  We don't get embarrassed when buying tampons.

78.  We're better gossips.

79.  We have better fashion sense.

80.  We're better shoppers.

81.  We don't have to make fools out of ourselves to impress a man.

82.  Our friends don't pick on us if we aren't sleeping with anyone.

83.  Men don't know what our 'girl talk' is all about (and I'm not gonna tell you)

84.  We're all sitting on a gold mine - we know it and use it to our extreme advantage.

85.  We don't have to drive when on a date. 
86.  An ugly woman can use makeup and get a new hairdo to become presentable - ugly men are just ugly.

87. We can search for hours together in a shop not necessary to buy.

88. Don't have to maintain great physique.

89.  Women look better naked

90.  We know that rhythm doesn't only pertain to dancing.

91.  When women are short, we're petite.  When men are short, they're just short.

92.  Women do less time for violent crimes.

93.  Women don't have to worry about not being able to get it up.

94. There are many hands to lift  us when we slip to ground. Poor men they have to get up on their own.

95. And we don't have to feel shy about falling down.

96.  Women's conversations generally consist of more than just "uh huh, yep ok then bye"

97.  Women don't need an excuse to be in a bad mood.

98.  The remote control is not an extension of ourselves.

99.  Women are sexier.

100.  We can get laid ANYTIME, ANYWHERE, ANY WAY we want it.........!

Sleeping Tips

Stick to a schedule. Erratic bedtimes do not allow for your body to align to the proper circadian rhythms. Mum was right when she set a time we always had to go to sleep as kids. Also, make sure you try to keep the same schedule on weekends too, otherwise the next morning, you’d wake later and feel overly tired.

Sleep only at night. Avoid daytime sleep if possible. Daytime naps steal hours from nighttime slumber. Limit daytime sleep to 20-minute, power naps.



Exercise. It’s actually known to help you sleep better. Your body uses the sleep period to recover its muscles and joints that have been exercised. Twenty to thirty minutes of exercise every day can help you sleep, but be sure to exercise in the morning or afternoon. Exercise stimulates the body and aerobic activity before bedtime may make falling asleep more difficult.

Taking a hot shower or bath before bed helps bring on sleep because they can relax tense muscles.

Avoid eating just before bed. Avoid eat large meals or spicy foods before bedtime. Give yourself at least 2 hours from when you eat to when you sleep. This allows for digestion to happen (or at least start) well before you go to sleep so your body can rest well during the night, rather than churning away your food.

Avoid caffeine. It keeps you awake and that’s now what you want for a good nights sleep. We all know that.

Read a fiction book. It takes you to a whole new world if you really get into it. And then take some time to ponder over the book as you fall asleep. I find as I read more and more, regardless of the book, I get more tired at night and so find it easier to fall asleep. Different for others?

Have the room slightly cooler. I prefer this to a hot room. I prefer to turn off the heat and allow the coolness to circulate in and out of the windows. If I get cold, I wear warmer clothes. It also saves on the bills as you’re not going to require the heat all night long.

Sleep in silence. I find sleeping with no music or TV on more easy and restful. I guess others are different, but sleep with no distractions is best for a clearer mind.


Avoid alcohol before bedtime. It’s a depressant; although it may make it easier to fall asleep, it causes you to wake up during the night. As alcohol is digested your body goes into withdrawal from the alcohol, causing nighttime awakenings and often nightmares for some people.

Professors of different subjects define kiss the same word in different ways:

Prof. of Computer Science:
A kiss is a few bits of love compiled into a byte.


Prof. of Algebra:
A kiss is two divided by nothing.


Prof. of Geometry:
A kiss is the shortest distance between two straight lines.


Prof. of Physics:
A kiss is the contraction of mouth due to the expansion of the heart.


Prof. of Chemistry:
A kiss is the reaction of the interaction between two hearts.


Prof. of Zoology:
A kiss is the interchange of uni*---**---**---*ual salivary bacteria.


Prof. of Physiology:
A kiss is the juxtaposition of two orbicular ors muscles in the state of contraction.


Prof. of Dentistry:
A kiss is infectious and antiseptic.


Prof. of Accountancy:
A kiss is a credit because it is profitable when returned.


Prof. of Economics:
A kiss is that thing for which the demand is higher than the supply.


Prof. of Statistics:
A kiss is an event whose probability depends on the vital statistics of 36-24-36.


Prof. of Philosophy:
A kiss is the persecution for the child, ecstasy for the youth and homage for the old.


Prof. of English:
A kiss is a noun that is used as a conjunction; it is more common than proper; it is spoken in the plural and it is applicable to all.

Prof. of Engineering:
Uh, What? I'm not familiar with that term.

Dream that Indicates Wealth

1. If you see any God/Goddess in your dream, it truly indicates that you will achieve success along with wealth in coming days.
2. Watching a woman or girl dancing in your dreams is also an indication of receiving wealth.
3. Viewing kingfisher or crane in your dream also indicates respect and wealth coming to you within few days.
4. Viewing 'Kadam' tree in a dream is also an indicator of receiving wealth, good health and respect.
5. If you see 'Amla' and the flower lotus in your dream, it denotes that you are about to receive money in few days.
6. Seeing yourself wearing earrings in your dream is also an indication of receiving money.
7. Dreaming about a farmer working in his field indicates that you will receive wealth from any unknown source.
8. Dreaming about a lit 'Deepak' connotes some sort of blessings that you might receive in few days.
9. Viewing gold in your dream is also considered as an indicator of receiving wealth.
10. Seeing yourself wearing a ring in your dream also implies wealth.
11. Seeing a palace in your dream also indicates receiving a lot of wealth.
12. Taking milk out of a cow in your dream is also considered as an indicator of wealth.
13. Watching someone also taking milk out of the cow implies receiving sudden wealth.
14. Watching a white horse in your dream indicates happy future and wealth.
15. Viewing elephant in your dream denotes that you might receive wealth from any source.
16. Dreaming about a cow in your dream is also considered as a very auspicious sign. The viewer receives wealth, glory, grandeur and magnificence.
17. Dreaming about cow's milk and 'ghee' also denotes receiving of wealth.
18. The tree laden with fruits indicates wealth and richness.
19. Watching mice in your dream indicated wealth coming in your home.
20. Viewing black Scorpio in a dream signifies wealth.
21. Dreaming of a raised head of the snake connotes receiving wealth.
22. Watching a snake near his burrow indicates sudden receiving wealth.
23. If you see a dead bird in your dream, do not worry. It is a good sign and indicates sudden gain of wealth.
24. Viewing parrot in your dream is a strong indication if receiving money.
25. Watching mongoose in your dream signifies receiving diamonds and jewelries.
26. If you see the hive of bees in your dream then, it is an indication of gaining wealth.
27. If you see white ants in your dream, then also it indicates gain of wealth.
28. Dreaming about 'Aam ka Bagicha' implies all of a sudden gain of wealth and richness.
29. If you see yourself climbing a tree, then it indicates earning of money and wealth.
30. Watching yourself climbing a mountain in a dream is also an indicator of receiving money.

Human Brain Analysis--Man vs. Woman

Human Brain Analysis--Man vs. Woman



1. MULTI-TASKING

Womens brains designed to concentrate multiple task at a time. Women can Watch a TV and Talk over phone and cook. Mens brains designed to concentrate only one work at a time. Men can not watch TV and talk over the phone at the same time. they stop the TV while Talking. They can either watch TV or talk over the phone or cook.

2. LANGUAGE

Women can easily learn many languages. But can not find solutions to problems. Men can not easily learn languages, they can easily solve problems. That's why in average a 3 years old girl has three times higher vocabulary than a 3 years old boy.

3. ANALYTICAL SKILLS

Mens brains has a lot of space for handling the analytical process. They can analyze and find the solution for a process and design a map of a building easily. But If a complex map is viewed by women, they can not understand it. Women can not understand the details of a map easily, For them it is just a dump of lines on a paper.

4. CAR DRIVING.

While driving a car, mans analytical spaces are used in his brain. He can drive a car fastly. If he sees an object at long distance, immediately his brain classifies the object (bus or van or car) direction and speed of the object and he drives accordingly. Where woman take a long time to recognize the object direction/ speed. Mans single process mind stops the audio in the car (if any), then concentrates only on driving.

5. LYING

When men lie to women face to face, they get caught easily. Womans super natural brain observes facial expression 70%, body language 20% and words coming from the mouth 10%. Mens brain does not have this. Women easily lie to men face to face. So guys, do not lie face to face.

6. PROBLEMS SOLVING


If a man have a lot of problems, his brain clearly classifies the problems and puts them in individual rooms in the brain and then finds the solution one by one. You can see many guys looking at the sky for a long time. If a woman has a lot of problems, her brain can not classify the problems. she wants some one to hear that. After telling everything to a person she goes happily to bed. She does not worry about the problems being solved or not.

7. WHAT THEY WANT

Men want status, success, solutions, big process, etc... But Women want relationship, friends, family, etc...

8. UNHAPPINESS

If women are unhappy with their relations, they can not concentrate on their work. If men are unhappy with their work, they can not concentrate on the relations.

9. SPEECH

Women use indirect language in speech. But Men use direct language.

10. HANDLING EMOTION

Women talk a lot without thinking. Men act a lot without thinking

Natural Cure

CURE FOR ACIDITY


Acidity, it is said, is worse than Cancer. It is one of the most common dis-ease people encounter in their daily life. The home remedy for Acidity is Raw Grains of Rice.

The Process:

1. Take 8 - 10 grains of raw uncooked rice

2. Swallow it with water before having your breakfast or eating anything in the morning

3. Do this for 21 days to see effective results and continuously for 3 months to eliminate acidity from the body

The Cure:

Reduces acid levels in the body and makes you feel better by the day.


CURE FOR CHOLESTEROL:


Cholesterol problem accompanies with Hypertension and Heart Problems. This is also one of the common problems in people who have High Blood Pressure and Diabetes. The home remedy for Cholesterol problem is RAW SUPARI.

The Process:

1. Take Raw Supari (Betel Nut that is not flavoured) and slice them or make pieces of the same

2. Chew it for about 20 - 40 minutes after every meal

3. Spit it out

The Cure:

When you chew the supari, the saliva takes in the juice that is generated and this acts like a Blood Thinner. Once your blood becomes free flowing, it brings down the pressure in the blood flow, thereby reducing Blood Pressure too.


CURE FOR BLOOD PRESSURE:


One of the simple home remedy cure for Blood Pressure is Methi Seeds or Fenugreek Seeds.

The Process:

1. Take a pinch of Raw Fenugreek Seeds, about 8 - 10 seeds

2. Swallow it with water before taking your breakfast, every morning

The Cure:

The seeds of Fenugreek are considered good to reduce the blood pressure.



CURE FOR DIABETES:

There are 2 home remedies for Diabetes. One is Ladies Finger and the other is Black Tea.

BLACK TEA:Due to high medication, the organ that is worst affected is the Kidney. It has been observed that Black Tea (tea without milk, sugar or lemon) is good for the Kidney. Hence a cup of black tea every morning is highly advisable.


The Process:
1. Boil water along with the tea leaves (any tea leaves will do).

2. Drink the concoction without addingmilk, sugar or lemon.

The Cure:
Black Tea will help in enhancing the function of the kidney, thereby not affecting it more.



LADIES FINGER or OKRA:
Ladies finger is considered to be a good home medicine for diabetes.


The Process:
1. Slit the ladies finger into 2 halves vertically and soak it in water overnight.

2. The next morning, remove the ladies fingers and drink the water, before eating your breakfast.

The Cure:
After the ladies fingers are soaked overnight in the water, you can observe that the water becomes sticky in the morning. This sticky water is considered to be good for people who suffer from Diabetes.



OIL PULLING:


Dr. Med. Karch, a Russian, introduced a simple process for the Human body by using oil. This was further popularized by Lt. Col T. Koteswara Rao (Retd.). Initially it causes doubts, but after trying it out the results are astonishing.

The Process:
1. Take one spoon of refined oil in the mouth on an empty stomach early in the morning, before eating or drinking anything.

2. Without much effort or speed, slowly suck and pull the oil through the teeth. Gargle the oil within closed mouth for 15 - 20 minutes.

3. During this process, the oil becomes liquid and white like milk. Spit the liquid out and wash your mouth thoroughly, preferably with warm water.

4. DO NOT SWALLOW the oil as it contains toxins and harmful bacteria drawn from the body through the saliva. Continue this process everyday for better results.

The Cure:
The process of Oil Pulling can give relief and cure Headaches, Asthma, Bad Breath, Nose Block, Tooth Pain, Acidity, Ulcers, Cracked Feet, Joint Pains, Stomach Problems, Problems related to Lungs, Liver & Nerves.

Who can practice this:
Oil Pulling can be practiced by all from the age of 5 years onwards for any type of health problems. People who are in a habit of taking a lot of medicines should try this, as it will release a lot of toxins from the body.

Which Oil to be Used:
Any cooking oil can be used, but the most preferred is the Sesame Oil.

don't mesh with Engineer

interviewer :Let me check your word Power... ENGINEER: ok Sir ..... Interviewer : Tell me the opposite of .....good. ENGINEER: hmmmm..... Bad Interviewer : Come ENGINEER: Go. Interviewer : Ugly. ENGINEER: Pichlli. Interviewer : PICHLLIIIII? ENGINEER: UGLYYYYYYYYY.. Interviewer : Shut Up. ENGINEER: Keep Talking. Interviewer ok now stop these all.. ENGINEER: now carry on this all Interviewer :abe...chup ho ja..chup ho ja..chup ho jaaaa ENGINEER:abe bolta rah..bolta rah..bolta rahhh Interviewer :Areeee yaaar ENGINEER: areeee dushmannnnnn Interviewer : Get Out. ENGINEER: Come In. Interviewer : Oh my God. ENGINEER : Oh my Devil. Interviewer : U r Rejected. ENGINEER: I m selected...Than k u thank u sir. Moral-Dont ever try to mess with engineer..

Wives

1. Quote on a man’s T-shirt:

All women are devils...

But my wife is QUEEN of them!

2.Man was sent on earth to suffer...

Women was sent to make sure it happens!

3. A man asked for poison.

Chemist refused, since it required prescription.

He showed his Marriage Certificate.

4. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right,

And other is husband!

5. Husband Wife always compromise.

Husband always admits that he is wrong, and wife agrees with him.

6. Husband wife had a long argument.

Wife concluded: See dear; do you want to WIN or be HAPPY?

7. A man speaks 25000 words daily,

A woman speaks 30000 words.

Problem starts when husband comes from office after finishing his 25000,

Wife starts her quota of 30000 words!

8. Boy: My dad is billionaire 93-years old.

He will die soon.

Will you marry me?

Girl: NO.

A week later she became his step-mother.

Moral: Don’t give ideas to girls.

9. Two things in life are difficult to achieve:

(1) to plant your idea in someone’s head,

(2) to plant somebody’s money in your pocket.

10. * He who succeeds in the 1st, we call him TEACHER;

* He who succeeds in the 2nd, we call him GOVERNMENT;

* The one who succeeds in both, we call WIFE;

* The one who fails in both, we call HUSBAND!

11. Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE?

It Means-Worries Invited For Ever...

Wife: No; it means- With Idiot For Ever !!!

12. No one teaches a volcano how to erupt...

No one teaches a tsunami how to arise…

No one teaches a hurricane how to sway around...

No one teaches a man how to choose a wife…

Natural Disasters just happen…!!!

13. Why are wives more dangerous than the Mafia?

The Mafia wants either or money or life...

The wives want both!

14. Searching these keywords on Google 'How to tackle wife?'

Google search result, 'Good day sir, Even we are searching'.

15. Compromising does not mean you are wrong and your wife is right.

It only means that the safety of your head is much more important than your ego!

16. Imagine living with 3 wives in one compound and never leaving the house for 5 years.

Osama Bin Laden must have called the US Navy Seals himself!

17. Whisky is a brilliant invention…

One double and you start feeling single again.

18. A friend recently explained why he refuses to get to married.

He says the wedding rings look like miniature handcuffs.

19. American: In India, do you guys call your wives HONEY in your native language?

Indian: Oh no; we call them BEE-BEE… they sting twice as hard as HONEY BEE…

Food as Medicine

HAY FEVER? EAT YOGURT! 
Eat lots of yogurt before pollen season. 
Also-eat honey from your area (local region) daily.

TO PREVENT STROKE DRINK TEA! 
Prevent build-up of fatty deposits on artery walls with regular doses of tea. (actually, tea suppresses appetite and keeps the pounds from invading....Green tea is great for our immune system)! 

INSOMNIA (CAN'T SLEEP?) HONEY! 
Use honey as a tranquilizer and sedative. 

ASTHMA? EAT ONIONS!!!! 
Eating onions helps ease constriction of bronchial tubes. (onion packs place on chest helped the respiratory ailments and actually made breathing better).

ARTHRITIS? EAT FISH, TOO!! 
Salmon, tuna, mackerel and sardines actually prevent arthritis. (fish has omega oils, good for our immune system) 

UPSET STOMACH? BANANAS - GINGER!!!!! 
Bananas will settle an upset stomach. 
Ginger will cure morning sickness and nausea.. 

BLADDER INFECTION? DRINK CRANBERRY JUICE!!!! 
High-acid cranberry juice controls harmful bacteria. 

BONE PROBLEMS? EAT PINEAPPLE!!! 
Bone fractures and osteoporosis can be prevented by the manganese in pineapple. 

MEMORY PROBLEMS? EAT OYSTERS! 
Oysters help improve your mental functioning by supplying much-needed zinc. 

COLDS? EAT GARLIC! 
Clear up that stuffy head with garlic. (remember, garlic lowers cholesterol, too.)

COUGHING? USE RED PEPPERS!! 
A substance similar to that found in the cough syrups is found in hot red pepper. Use red (cayenne) pepper with caution-it can irritate your tummy. 

BREAST CANCER? EAT Wheat, bran and cabbage 
Helps to maintain estrogen at healthy levels. 

LUNG CANCER? EAT DARK GREEN AND ORANGE AND VEGGIES!!! 
A good antidote is beta carotene, a form of Vitamin A found in dark green and orange vegetables. 

ULCERS? EAT CABBAGE ALSO!!! 
Cabbage contains chemicals that help heal both gastric and duodenal ulcers. 

DIARRHEA? EAT APPLES! 
Grate an apple with its skin, let it turn brown and eat it to cure this condition. (Bananas are good for this ailment)

CLOGGED ARTERIES? EAT AVOCADO! 
Mono unsaturated fat in avocados lowers cholesterol. 

HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE? EAT CELERY AND OLIVE OIL!!! 
Olive oil has been shown to lower blood pressure. 
Celery contains a chemical that lowers pressure too. 

BLOOD SUGAR IMBALANCE? EAT BROCCOLI AND PEANUTS!!! 
The chromium in broccoli and peanuts helps regulate insulin and blood sugar. 

Kiwi: Tiny but mighty. This is a good source of potassium, magnesium, Vitamin E fibre. It's Vitamin C content is twice that of an orange. 

Apple: An apple a day keeps the doctor away? Although an apple has a low Vitamin C content, it has antioxidants flavonoids which enhances the activity of Vitamin C thereby helping to lower the risks of colon cancer, heart attack stroke.. 

Strawberry: Protective fruit. Strawberries have the highest total antioxidant power among major fruits protects the body from cancer causing, blood vessels clogging free radicals. (Actually, any berry is good for you..they're high in anti-oxidants and they actually keep us young...........blueberries are the best and very versatile in the health field........they get rid of all the free-radicals that invade our bodies)

Orange : Sweetest medicine. Taking 2 - 4 oranges a day may help keep colds away, lower cholesterol, prevent dissolve kidney stones as well as lessen the risk of colon cancer.. 

Watermelon: Coolest Thirst Quencher. Composed of 92% water, it is also packed with a giant dose of glutathione which helps boost our immune system.. They are also a key source of lycopene - the cancer fighting oxidant. Other nutrients 
Found in watermelon are Vitamin C Potassium.(watermelon also has natural substances [natural SPF sources] that keep our skin healthy, protecting our skin from those darn UV rays)


Guava Papaya: Top awards for Vitamin C. They are the clear winners for their high Vitamin C content. Guava is also rich in fibre which helps prevent constipation. 

Papaya is rich in carotene, this is good for your eyes. (also good for gas and indigestion) 

Tomatoes are very good as a preventative measure for men, keeps those prostrate problems from invading their bodies......GOOD AS MEDICINE..
Very informative - spread the Knowledge

How To Read A Woman's Mind

• Big smiles with upper and lower teeth showing with a relaxed face.
• Biting of the lips or showing of the tongue, licking her lips or touching of her front teeth.
• She wets her lips, some women use only a single-lip lick, wetting the upper or lower lip, while others run the tongue around the entire lip area.
• She puts her fingernail between her teeth.
• She protrudes her lips and thrust her brea$ts forward.

Her eyes -

• She gazes in your eyes with deep interest and her pupils are dilated.
• She raises both eyebrows exaggeratedly for a couple of seconds, this is often combined with a smile and some eye contact.
• She winks at you while talking to you or winks at you from a distance.
• While talking to you, she blinks more than usual, fluttering her eyelashes.
• Eyebrows raised and then lowered, then a smile indicates interest in you.

Her hair -

• She pushes her fingers through her hair. This can be one hand movement or more of a stroking motion.
• She twirls her hair around her fingers while she is looking at you.
• She is throwing her hair back off her shoulders.
•  

Her clothing -

• If she is wearing clothes that show her nipples underneath and you notice they are getting perky and erect.
• The hem goes up to expose a little more leg.
• She is fixing, patting or smoothing her outfit to make herself look better.
•  

While she is seated -

• She moves in time to the music, with her eyes on you.
• She starts sitting straight up and her muscles appear to be firm.
• She is sitting with her legs open.
• She sits with her legs crossed in a manner to reveal her thigh.
• Her legs are rubbing against each other.
• Her legs are rubbing against the leg of the table.
• Her crossed leg is pointed towards you or if that same leg is rocking back and forth towards you.

Her hands -

• She exposes the palms of her hand facing you.
• While talking to you, she rests an elbow in the palm of one hand, while holding out her other hand, palm up.
• She rubs her wrists up and down.
• She sits with one hand touching one of her breasts.
• She rubs her chin or touches her cheek. This indicates that she's thinking about you and her relating in some way.
• She is fondling keys, sliding hands up and down a glass, playing with toys or other things on the table.
• She plays with her jewellery, especially with stroking and pulling motions.
• She touches your arm, shoulder, thigh, or hand while talking to you (in case you already haven't started kino yourself, dumbass:).
• She is pretending to look at her watch as you pass her.

Her voice -

• She raises or lowers the volume of her voice to match yours.
• She speeds up or slows down her speaking to match yours.
• She laughs in unison with you.
• In a crowd she speaks only to you and focuses all of her undivided attention on you.
•  

Miscellaneous -

• She mirrors your body language and body positions.
• Her skin tone becomes red while being around you.
• She blows smoke straight out from between her lips and toward you.
• She leans over and speaks into her friend's ear, just like in junior high school.
• She is standing with her head cocked slightly at an angle, one foot behind the other, hips slightly thrust forward.
• At a party - every once in a while she seems to appear out of nowhere in your vicinity and if you move to another spot, soon she appears out of nowhere again, you catch her glancing in your general direction (actually, glancing at YOU dummy!, she bumps into you… accidentally, touches you… accidentally etc.

When talking to a girl, these are some of the more important signs to watch for -

• Can you keep conversation going with her?
• Does she react well to kino?
• Does she touch you?
• Does she laugh?