Sunday, November 9, 2014

1 Why was the sardar arrested in a political rally? Because he saw a girl going around with a badge on her chest saying PRESS. And he pressed!



2 Two sardars went to a callgirl. First sardar went in,came out and said: No my wife is better. Second sardar went in,came out and said: Yes,you are right. Your wife is better!



3 In a party a lady wanted to go to the toilet. So she inquired with a sardar: Susu karne ki jagah dikhao. Sardar replied: You naughty lady,pehle tum dikhao!



4 Sardar and a girl were having sex. Suddenly the sardar asked: Do you have AIDS? Girl said: No. Sardar said: Thank God, I don´t want to get that again!



5 A sardar met a blonde in a bar and said to her: Let us have sex. She said: OK but I am having my menstrual cycle. Sardar said: That is fine. I have my Hero Honda!



6 Sardar to wife: Nikal teri sari,nikal teri panty,nikal teri bra,nikal meri pant,nikal meri chaddi. Ab dabaa jor se,aur jor se. Ab hui na suitcase bandh!



7 A gang of sardars looted a bank,broke open the safe and found chilled lassi inside. They drank happily and left. Next day's headline: SARDARS LOOT SPERM BANK!



8 Sardarni was taking bath with the door open to make sure that no one was peeping through the keyhole!



9 Ek sardar ko peshab karte dekh ladki doosre raste se jane lagi;-. Sardar bola: Daro mat baby, jisase dar rahi ho usko maine pakad rakha hai!



10 Biwi ka antim sanskar kar ke sardar ghar ja raha tha ki bijli chamki, badal garaje aur jor se barsat hui. Sardar bola: Lagata hai pahunch gayi!



11 Sardar´s wife asked: What is the difference between PYAR and ISHQ ? Sardar said: PYAR is what I do with my sister and ISHQ is what I do with your sister!



12 Sardar and wife were waiting at the signal. A tapori came aside and asked: Kya paaji, rakheil hai kya? A furious sardar said: Rakheil hogi teri, meri to biwi hai!



13 Sardar with two burnt ears said to his doctor: I was ironing the clothes and accidently picked up the iron instead of the phone. Doctor asked: But what about the other ear? Sardar said: That bastard called again!



14 Man: Sardarji where were you born? Sardar: Punjab Man: Which part? Sardar: Oye, part part ki karda hai, whole body born in Punjab!



15 Sardar to servant: Go and water the plants Servant: But its already raining Sardar: Oye, ulloo ke patthe, then take an umbrella and go!



16 Sardar goes to buy an underwear. On choosing one the shopkeeper tells him its of Rs 500. Sardar says: Arre bhai dailywear dikhao, partywear nahin!



17 Man asked sardar: Why does Manmohan Singh go for walks in the evening only? Sardar replied: Arre bhai, he is PM not AM!



18 Sardar to doctor: I have loose motions and I am not able to stop it. Doctor: Did you try lemon? Sardar: Yes, but when I remove it, it starts again!



19 On a romantic date, sardar´s girlfriend asked him: Darling, on our engagement will you give me a ring? Sardar: Yeah, sure. Give me your telephone number!



20 Question: Sardarji, aapko thand lagti hai to aap kya karte hai? Sardar: Main candle ke paas baith jata hoon. Question: Agar phir bhi thand lage to? Sardar: Oye, candle jalata hoon!



21 Doctor to sardar: Aapka aur aapki biwi ka blood group ek hi hai.Sardar: Zaroor hoga,25 saal se mera khoon jo pi rahi hai!



22 Sardar:Can i touch ur Software?

   Girl:First show me ur Hardware!

   Sardar:Should i install it in ur System?

   Girl:Cover it with Anti Virus & then Install



23 A sardar has pulled out six people from a burning house but still was in jail. Why? Because all the    six were fire-brigade staff!



24 A sardar wanted twins. So what did he do? He made two holes in the condom!



25 A sardar sitting in a pub saw a sexy blonde but the barmen said she was a lesbian. Sardar said: No problem. He walked to her and asked: So, where do you live in Lesbia?!



26 How can a sardar kill a lion? Sardar thinks, thinks hard and comes to a conclusion: I will drink poison and then let the lion eat me!

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